All Your Snakes Are Belong To Us

Darren Dirt · August 20, 2006, 10:23:07 PM

All Your Snakes Are Belong To Us -- it didn't take long...

NSFW, but well done for the most part so watch it at home or something.

Thorin · August 20, 2006, 11:01:53 PM

So you're sitting at the airport, waiting for your plane to come in. It should be here already. So you check the board. Snakes! (click the image to make it bigger to see what I'm talking about...)

Darren Dirt · August 20, 2006, 11:41:54 PM

I've had eNOUGH of them!

PS: YEAH BAYBEE -- check out IMDB, 9000 users have rated it, and about 70% gave it 10/10 ... the other 30% prolly didn't realize it's a mofo COMEDY.

Lazybones · August 21, 2006, 12:45:07 AM

I am not really interested in seeing it but Samuel L. Jackson saies Stephanie should go see it. (WARNING LANGUAGE)

Darren Dirt · August 21, 2006, 08:37:24 AM

Wow, 160 SoaP YTMNDs and counting...

"Quick working on your fancy hair-don't" hehe that Sam Jackson, what a punster

Darren Dirt · August 23, 2006, 11:25:57 AM

Brilliant observations from someone who hated the pre-release hype... but enjoyed the mofo movie:

"Never mind the merits of Snakes on a Plane; good, bad, or mediocre, admit this: We got played by a subsidiary of Time Warner."

http://www.pajiba.com/snakes-on-a-plane.htm (slight spoiler warning)

Quote
And, of course New Line didn't screen Snakes on a Plane for critics. Why? Because it [mofo] sucks. That's why. The CGI is subpar. The plot is paper thin. The dialogue is atrocious. And the acting is downright horrendous."

And yet ... and yet despite it all ...

I haven't had this much fun watching a movie since Ash Williams stood with a shotgun in one hand and a chainsaw in the other, beckoning: "Gimme some sugar, baby." I [kid] you not, folks, Snakes on a Plane is every bit of god-awful fantastic that the hype portends.

Truthfully, SoaP defies everything I ever believed about filmmakers who actually set out with the intention of making a good-bad flick; I didn't think it could be done. And maybe without the attendant hype, it couldn't have, because damn near half of Snakes success comes from the spectacle of 75 college kids ripped to the tits chanting "Snakes on a Plane" and tossing toy planes around the theater. Indeed, Snakes absolutely demands an audience. It's a participatory event.

I actually applauded. More than once. And I didn't even shake my head in wonder when the audience gave it a standing ovation as the credits rolled.

I could give you a plot summary, but really there's little point. It is as advertised. It's got a plane. It's got snakes. And they attack the passengers. A lot. In fact, it is one of the few times that there are actually enough violent death scenes to quench one's need for blood ... yes, I -- a grown man -- found myself recoiling in my seat like a goddamn ninny.

But the real shame of it is that the Internet culture has actually managed to build something that lives up to its expectation, but in the process it's alienated many of the people who would've enjoyed it. ...who'd rather snack on their own toenails than buy into New Line's manipulation, or who have an imaginary muzzleloader trained on the next guy who utters that Sam Jackson catch-phrase aloud. And the dubious skeptics -- the kind of person with too much pride to jump on this bandwagon -- will never believe that it could possibly live up to the hype. They will read this review; they will see the comments below; and they will shake their head and "baaaah."

Lazybones · August 23, 2006, 12:09:13 PM

To quote Indiana Jones "I hate snakes..." Well at least the hype around the movie...

Darren Dirt · August 23, 2006, 01:18:40 PM

Quote from: Lazybones on August 23, 2006, 12:09:13 PM
To quote Indiana Jones "I hate snakes..." Well at least the hype around the movie...

Sam "F-Bomb" Bee would prolly agree wit ya...
http://www.comedycentral.com/sitewide/media_player/play.jhtml?itemId=73262

Mr. Analog · August 23, 2006, 01:50:37 PM

Pfft! It's been done, I starred in a low budget overight success last spring with "Snakes in an Apartment", as far as I'm concerned they owe me royalty cheques.

Darren Dirt · August 23, 2006, 04:42:03 PM

"...Snakes absolutely demands an audience. It's a participatory event."

Anyone interested in going perhaps Friday evening? Don't think the full effect will be there on DVD, so perhaps seeing it surrounded by other folks looking for 90 minutes of fun escapism will be worth it.

Mr. Analog · August 23, 2006, 04:47:06 PM

Let's see, spend >$10 to hear someone in the audience yell out "OMG! Snakes!"

That's a big MEH, Good Buddy!

Also, disc golf!

Mr. Analog · August 25, 2006, 07:49:39 PM

Darren Dirt · August 26, 2006, 03:47:10 PM

The "All Your Snakes" video has both of them in there, but yeah that comic is pretty funny too

Darren Dirt · September 10, 2006, 07:19:50 PM

Aha, this explains it all...
How Hollywood Really Works